Wake Up & Live

Bon anniversaire à moi!

What the fuck do y’all niggas really want? (all that shine)

My dream is to learn to write… correctly.

Hmm.  I never really understood how people could care about possessions.  How something so lifeless suddenly begins gaining your affection with no effort.  An ipod that just played music when you were upset, or a teddy bear you hugged when you were sad.  Putting emotion into things was never easy for me.  I had toys I liked a lot and that I played with more, but never things to cry over, you know?

               This makes no sense, but I never understood how I put so much emotion into people.  Not romantic emotion, but just emotion.  Giving them emotion was an effort for me and it was an effort I liked doing.  I didn’t mind caring about people or giving them my time.  The hardest part of the process was when they were gone.  Not because of some problem but because of time.  People just grow apart and lose interest.

            It’s time I stop doing that.  I am at the point in my extremely short life where I am friendless.  Not by force or anything, but by choice.  I hate letting people into my deranged world and being left alone again. I guess I do make it overly dramatic, buuuuut what can I say.  That’s what I do.    

Never been that great of a friend anyway. 

real talk.

So I gave a speech in class trying to shed a tiny bit of light of the struggles in Arizona earlier this week.  I feel I did pretty well you know.  I stood there and knew every line word by word, not only because I memorized it, but because I felt it.  Meaning, I wasn’t just doing it for a grade, but because I genuinely felt what I was saying.  I did my share of research and laid it all out there.
 

After I go to my seat I drink a bit of water waiting for my teacher to give a little bit of feedback (which he does if he finds interest in your story).  I sit there and he tells the class about an incident he had with a Mecha group in college.  He continues to tell us about a time he tried joining and was revoked entry because of the fact that he’s white.  I personally was not offended.  He could have done that to make me look dumb and say my efforts are worthless, because in the end programs like that are useless.  What got me upset was the fact that this still is happening.  People who are trying to fight for equality don’t necessarily follow the ways themselves.  This just got me thinking

P.S. Fuck the grammar.